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About bee_bee44

bee_bee44 started this conversation
Jul 28, 2010

I'm 5 months pregnant and need some advise on what to do with my living situation. I've been with the same guys 3 years and his parents told us we could have the down stairs if we fixed it up, but lately all my boyfriend been doing is spending the money on video games and guitars. I've been the only one buying baby stuff. So since he has failed to get the down stairs together [because were stating in his parents den] their kicking us out because they want their family room back. I have no job, but my parents sent me 200 a month and feel like my options are limited  

 I don't know what to do at all 

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Starshine
Jul 28, 2010
 in response to Late bloomer...   Good point Late bloomer about her boyfriend feeling left out with her pregnancy. Men and even women tend to feel left out. Example when it came to my wedding mom and I with dad planned it but dad was left out more than he should have been. Maybe because of his controling ways or wanting everything perfect but when I found out how much he was left out, I didn't like it as he mostly was paying for it. So we need to involve everyone in a decision process with limitations if need be. My dad resented that he wasn't more in the decision process and I didn't think it was funny either. Always better to ask how one feels about things than not to ask.
reply to Starshine
Late bloomer
Jul 28, 2010

I agree with Starshine, it sounds as if your man has not yet come to the realisation of paternal responsibilities. Talk to him calmly, let him know exactly how you feel about the situation and find out he feels about the setup. Share ideas, involve him in planning for the baby, he may be feeling left out and resenting the baby inwardly.  

reply to Late bloomer
Starshine
Jul 28, 2010

Hello

You need to talk with your boyfriend and explain things like getting the room downstairs fixed so you have a place to live. See if you can talk to his parents about staying there. This is the last thing you need is for him not to be responsible.  I lived with someone before marrying him but we had our own place. Call 211 to see what kind of programs can help you in our state. 

http://ca.gov/HomeFamily/ChildrenFamilies/Calworks.html

CalWorks or Temporary Assistance to Needy Families

    * CalWorks - California Department of Social Services
      Find out how the California program for temporary assistance to families works in providing housing, food, utilities, clothing or medical care.
    * Women, Infants and Children (WIC) - California Department of Health Services
      Learn how low income pregnant, breastfeeding and post-partum women, and children under age five can receive supplemental nutritious food and nutrition education.
    * Temporary Assistance to Needy Families - U.S. Department of Health and Human Services
      Learn more about the Federal programs which help families in need of temporary assistance and what these programs are called in each of the fifty states.

The link I gave you has more information than this but I think this may help you but it wouldn't hurt to look at the whole website

Good luck

reply to Starshine